Should we become a blended family?

Dear Sylvia:

The man who I have been seeing wants me and my six-year-old daughter to move in with him. While it would be nice to be able to save some money, I’m not sure that this would be a good idea. He has two children from a former marriage. They are eight and nine-years-old and are both girls. We have most of our evening meals there, and I cook.

The problem I am having is that his house is always a mess, his girls fight a lot, and his ex frequently “drops by”, unannounced, to see the girls. Her attitude toward my daughter and me is usually hostile, and he does very little to defend us.

He’s been hinting at marriage. It would be nice not to be a single parent anymore. Do you think we should go ahead and move in with him?

Wondering in North Carolina



Dating and the Kids

When you are single, dating can still be challenging, but when you are a single parent, dating takes on a completely new dimension. Double that if both of you are single parents. There are the obvious pre-date demands such as finding a babysitter, coordinating work schedules, and making sure you are not scheduling a date on the night your child has a recital. Some single parents feel guilty about dating, and others are not even sure they remember what to do on a date. You can recognize a single parent on a date, because they are always checking their cell phone.


For the Ultimate Romantic Date – Stay Home

The best place for your ultimate romantic date is not the new French restaurant with a Paris theme, and menu items you cannot pronounce, or the little intimate spot where you usually have a long wait. Unbelievably, the perfect place for a special date night is right at home.


Jealousy in a Relationship

“The jealous are troublesome to others, but a torment to themselves.” William Penn

Can anyone say, with complete honesty, that he or she has never experienced jealousy? Be careful how you answer, for if you are still warm and have a pulse, chances are very good that sometime in your life you have been jealous of either someone, or something. Many confuse jealousy with love. They think if they are jealous of their partner, it expresses love. This could not be further from the truth. Jealousy is an emotion that has nothing to do with love. It is an emotion based on fear. This fear comes from being insecure with oneself.


Cougar Dating

No, this is not about some kinky hook-up with a four-legged mountain feline. This is about the growing trend of older women dating younger men. Unlike the acceptable practice of a younger woman dating an older man, an older woman dating a younger man is cause to jam the phone lines. What is this double standard? They call the older woman a cougar. You immediately picture the poor unwitting younger man as prey, devoured by the older woman. Poor guy. Dry your eyes, younger men know the danger, and they love it! Cougar dating did not just come on the scene, but was brought center stage when older female celebrities such as Demi Moore, Halle Berry, Sharon Stone, and Mariah Carey started dating and marrying younger men. Suddenly, the concept became hot!


Speed Dating

We have fast food, drive-thru pharmacies, 1-hour cleaners, and a host of other speedy services. Dating had to follow. It only makes sense. Who has time these days to ferret out potential dates? With work, and meetings, Zumba classes, and working out, spare time is a precious commodity. Speed dating has a certain appeal for those in a time management crunch, or for those who wish to avoid the typical awkward first date.


Best romantic restaurants in San Diego

The food at these restaurants will excite your taste buds.

Just Friends – Or Lovers?

My husband, who works at home and takes care of our kids, became friendly (because of our respective children) with a stay-at-home mom.  At first, it was just a play date here and there, but then with the summer break, the play dates increased.  Now they have become actual friends.  They get together often, though always with the kids of course, and they also text each other a lot. This is beginning to worry me.


Should You Move in Together?

“If you think you know someone, live with them and you’ll know for sure!” — Jamie Arnold

You and your partner have been exclusively dating for a while now, and see each other every day. You are always together and cannot stand to be apart. Your stuff is at both places, and saying goodnight to each other on the phone seems so impersonal now. The answer seems simple, move in together.  Not only will you be together even more, but look at all the money you will save. Only one rent to pay, sharing expenses, and not having to drive back and forth between residences. This is definitely a win-win situation, right? Before you rent that moving truck, you should consider a few things.



“The more connections you and your lover make, not just between your bodies, but between your minds, your hearts, and your souls, the more you will strengthen the fabric of your relationship, and the more real moments you will experience together.”                    Barbara de Angelis


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